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"HEY! STOP IT.STOP.ENOUGH.BOTH OF YOU!....WHAT'S GOING HERE?"
A shrill whistle blown by the warden and by a couple of guards before this statement brought me back to my senses. I looked around and I was in the lunch hall.My fellow prison mates were watching me.Wondering what I would do next. Both my fists was drawn.I had my cellmate Tyler pinned to the ground.I had been punching him for sometime,apparently.Parts of his face were red and purple.His left eye was shut completely. Swollen and shut.Like a light red walnut.His left eye looked mostly okay.But that was closed too.Probably cause he had blacked out already.Blood was oozing out of his mouth.But it was moving slowly down his jaw and chin as it had mixed with his clear saliva.The inside of his mouth seemed all dark red except for the little of the yellow of his teeth.He had a little bit of blood from his nostrils over his thick mustache. It looked like the bleeding had stopped there.

I tried to get up.My forearms ached.I slowly released my fists.They were smeared with blood.Some of it was mine too. My legs were tired.I felt like I had just walked 50 miles and was on my knees for 5 hours after that.I raised both my hands and got up, which put further pressure on my knees.I took a slow step over the guy.I walked up to the warden with my hands still high. I saw one of the guards raising his baton to strike me.As I turned my face away, another guard struck my stomach.I collapsed on the floor and the guards began to kick me. I rested my head on the cold floor.As I was lying there in the pain,everything slowly turned dark. Silence and darkness surrounded me.

Why was I in prison?
Why did I beat up Tyler?
When do I return to the real world?

What had happened to Emma?

Ah! Emma.Her pale white face.Her thick dark brown hair falling perfectly over her face.Whenever I moved some behind her ear, I felt like it was like that time I saw her in kindergarten for the first time.Oh! How I long to feel her soft cheeks again. That thin upper lip.Her perfectly shaped lips which were such a pleasure to kiss.Those imperfect dimples which appeared whenever she smiled.All of her emotions can be read by just looking into her eyes.Her long slender fingers gave her hands such elegance.And when we held each other she gave me that warm reassuring feeling inside of never letting go.The last time we held each other like that was 15 years ago outside the courtroom.

I had just bought a new car.A bright red '63 Chevy convertible.We loved to travel together.And so I thought it would be a nice way to travel during our honeymoon.And we can save some money on travel.I wanted it to be a surprise.And when I finally showed it to her,she wrapped her hands around me, pulled me towards her and gave me the longest kiss I've ever gotten.I let her take it out for a spin.And I sat next to her.In a while we were way beyond the speed limit cruising on the freeway.Just as I was about to ask her to slow it down, I looked at her. As her brunette hair waved freely behind and the orange rays from the streetlamps we went past, illuminated her face, her eyes glistened because of her tears. She was so beautiful.So joyful. Do I deserve this angel?

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I saw her smile fading slowly and her eyes grew bigger.She swerved the steering and I heard the wheels screeching.We felt a thud and then a bump and after a while the car slowed down to a stop. We turned around to see a dark figure lying on the road. Perfectly still. In a pool of something dark slowly increasing in size.We got out of the car. A man was lying face down on the road in a pile of blood. My heart was racing.    I knelt down and checked his pulse. We carried him to the car. I drove to the hospital. I called Emma a cab home after the nurses took him in. She wouldn't leave. I promised I would come home as soon as he wakes up. Shortly after she left,the doctors declared him "brought dead". I drove to the police station and surrendered. The police took me in for questioning. I refused to meet Emma. I couldn't. The accident had taken place a few days after our engagement. She would never let me take the fall.

I spent the next 15 years in Burnley prison which was within London itself. I've felt broken,suicidal and gone through almost all the ordeals a prisoner has to face in a vigorous imprisonment sentence. All I had with me during those times was a piece of paper with the address:

"15,Green Boulevard Street,
London-SW09 B11."
and ten words:
"Waiting for you to join me at our new place."

She had given this to me during our last meeting. I could tell something was wrong. She was definitely hiding something. She said something about us staying together at this rather peculiar looking address and that she is starting to save up some money to buy us a good spot there. She also said that it would be difficult for her to visit me after that day as her father had plans for her education abroad. He wanted her to become a teacher. This meeting happened eleven years ago. I didn't have much of a family,except for a drunk distant uncle who visited me during my first couple of years here. So no one visited me after Emma. I felt forgotten. Angry at times too. I knew she couldn't cut me off. But in prison,a man's mind tends to wander and if not emotionally strong enough,it's easy to believe that their worst nightmares are probably true. Eventually leading to a gross suicidal ending. Her cold blooded ambitious father probably wanted her to find someone else and move on. As time went by,I felt that if I really loved her I should let her go as she should live her life as it was meant to be. She deserves so much more. Nevertheless I carved those ten words on the wall of my cell. And as if the demons inside us aren't enough, there's people like Tyler who says things like that statement is nothing but "dead words" and that I shouldn't expect her to wait for me. Today I snapped and went for his neck. My release is in a couple of days and so I thought what the hell and pounded him.

When I finally woke up the next day,I was in my cell. Normally involvements in prison fights would send us directly to the solitary confinement cell. But since I was due tomorrow, they probably sent me back here. I spent the rest of the day doing my chores just like any other day but wondering what work I would do outside as I had spent a good part of my youth in my prison. How would Emma and I support our family? How much is society gonna hate us for being together?

Finally my day arrived. The hope of waking up to this day sustained me for fifteen years. I woke up with a start. I waited patiently for the guard to arrive and open my cell. He arrived slowly and I was led to the office to sign my release documents. The warden wished me luck and generously gave me a 100 pounds. After all the formalities were completed and I got my belongings, I was led to the gate. I stepped out. It was hard to leave.This place had become my home. It was hard to imagine a life outside. But this was not the time to get sentimental. I have an address to go to and a family to lead. I wondered why Emma didn't come to pick me up. I thought that after so long she would want to see me. But that didn't matter. I caught a cab and told him the address. I was fascinated by the developments which had taken place in the city. All the cars were so sophisticated. People were all staring at something in their palms that looked like calculators.The buildings were tall and so many of them had electrically lit boards on them.Everyone seemed to be in a great hurry. Modern clothing and fashion were a little difficult for me to understand. The ads didn't make any goddamn sense. The suspenders were clearly not trending anymore.

Finally the cab pulled to a stop.I paid the driver and I stepped out of the car.I saw the huge structure in front of me and I had never been so confused in my life.I was expecting to see a house or an apartment.What am I doing here? Why did Emma call me here? Where is she anyway? I saw the nameplate at the gate and yes, I was at the right place. I pushed the gate open and entered. This place was really silent. A bearded man dressed in black and white approached me.

"Yes.Can I help you?"
"Umm. Yeah probably. Do you know Emma Daniels? She was...."

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My words got stuck in my throat as soon as I caught a glimpse of the backyard. I walked past the man to the backyard and I hoped to be wrong. He held my arm and pulled me back. The man spoke to me and I realised that he had been expecting me for some time. But after a while, I couldn't listen to him. I couldn't comprehend. Tears started to well in my eyes. My knees weakened. I hugged the old man and sobbed uncontrollably. I couldn't believe what he was telling me. Then I suddenly let him go and reached into my pocket. I pulled out the parchment and tore it up into pieces.

As soon as the tatters landed on the ground I felt something familiar move in front of me. I looked up, past the old man. Everything was so blurry. I wiped my tears and I looked around. And suddenly I saw a figure of a woman dressed in blue and red standing at a distance. She was standing so still but her dark hair was free. It was flying about in the wind. I couldn't see her face so I moved a little closer. I stepped over the small pieces of the paper, I had held on to dearly for so long. As I got closer, her face got clearer. Suddenly I stopped. I could see her face. It was Emma. I could recognise those dimples from anywhere. But she started to slowly walk backward. Her smile faded and she turned around to walk. I began to call out, "Emma!! Emma!! It's me.It's Jim! I've come for you. What's up with this old guy? What's he saying? Where are you going?? Emma!!". I started to run.

 

A strong wind blew the pieces of paper unto the cemetery in the backyard of the church. And the old priest watched Jim with childlike fascination. It was not common even in those times to see a grown man chase absolutely nothing.

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